Melinda Guisao – December 22, 2019
Did you know that positive thinking helps reduce stress? It’s true! Medical professionals, Mayo Clinic, 2017, reveal how studies have shown that optimism and pessimism can affect your health and well-being. Thinking positive and having a positive outlook on life is a key element in effectively managing stress and enhancing your overall health.
According to Dr. Travis Bradberry, 2012, “[s]tress is a [powerful] threat for those of us who want to think clearly, reason effectively, and have a decent memory.” Dr. Bradberry, 2012, also revealed research from the Department of Biological and Clinical Psychology at Fredrich Schiller University in Germany that “found  exposure to negative emotional stimuli—the same kind of exposure you get in the presence of complainers and otherwise negative people—caused subjects’ brains to have the same emotional reactions that they experienced when stressed. What does this mean? Your brain gets trapped into the same negative emotional state it is exposed to in dealing with negative people. The longer the exposure, the harder it is for your brain.
Think about it - have you ever wondered why you feel mentally drained sometimes, or emotionally down after being around someone? That is negative energy.
Energy is not tangible, you can’t physically reach out and touch it, but you can certainly feel it. Many people don’t always realize they are negative, and to be honest, we all have our moments of discouragement, negativity, anxiety, or despair from life’s unpleasant situations. The problem is not with having a ‘bad day’ or a moment of negativity, the problem is when you allow yourself to stay there and fester in pessimism. A positive person never allows negative thoughts to take over their life. If you are negative, there is still hope for you – you can learn positive thinking habits to get yourself back on track.
Signs of a Negative Person/Energy
Always a victim – constantly complaining and criticizing others.
- Negative people feel everyone is against them and complain about everything. Robert Locke said it best in the 2018 article, “15 Signs of Negative People,” when he said, “they are usually the victim of lousy weather, a difficult boss, bad luck, and their upbringing.” Instead of seeing that, well, maybe I’m not a victim of those things, a lot of the negative things that have happened are because of the decisions I made, or maybe I need to think positive and work hard to create a positive outcome for myself.
- When a person is constantly telling you what you should or should not wear, where you should live, what you should drive, how you can’t afford to buy the house you are considering buying – they are the captain of the negative team. Most likely, they don’t even realize they are negative, but they are. Why? Because they can’t control their life issues, so they find it easier to tell someone else how to live their life.
- We all know that person (the glass is half-empty type), you know the one that talks about the annoying clouds at a beautiful beach (you think to yourself, there were clouds at the beach today?), or complains about the temperature in the room, when it is filled with warm smiles and cheer. You can count on them to come up with a negative outcome, no matter how positive the situation is.
- Most conversations are complaints or gossip. They are like a crack head itching for their next fix – “omg, have you heard about so and so…” or “did you hear about the massive shooting…” or “I heard Johnny couldn’t pay his light bill last week…” Over exposing yourself to negativity or bad news has been shown to contribute to anxiety and depression. That is why it is important to limit your exposure to negativity.
- Negative people tend to be overly sensitive to criticism, but have no problem dishing it out. They often take comments the wrong way and feel they are verbally attacked, even when someone is trying to help them in a particular area.
- Negative people can’t simply give a compliment or say something nice, ‘but’ usually finds its way right after the compliment. For example, they might say, “that’s a lovely dress, but it would have been better in the color blue,” or “it looks like a nice turnout, but it’s probably because the venue is small.”
- Positive people get excited or even anxious about dreams, the future and good things in life; however, you usually find a negative person rarely talks about or finds excitement in positive life events – as Locke, 2018, put it, “…they are too wrapped up in their present misery [to recognize joy, passion, contentment, and excitement].”
- If you find yourself getting into a lot of arguments with your friends, partner, or colleagues, that is an indication that your negative energy is the issue. Once you recognize it, improve it.
- They are unable to tap into their positive energy so what do they do? They drain you dry of all your energy. They demand all your time, attention and energy until you are feeling just as low and negative as they are (Locke, 2018).
- You can go to a negative person, all excited out something amazing happening in your life, but the negative person will tell you why you shouldn’t do it, or ‘warn you’ of the risks and dangers, or tell you that you should think about it before doing it. They always manage to find a way to turn the positive into a negative.
- Negative people take credit for all the good things that happen, but anytime something bad happens, it isn’t their fault. It is always everyone else’s fault but their own.
What causes a person to give off negative energy?
- A result of past experiences.
- Mental health conditions, such as anxiety and depression.
- You are experiencing a period of difficulty in life (going through a rough patch).
- Health issues that affect one’s ability to participate in activities they once enjoyed may cause them to be negative.
- Those with attention-deficit hyperactivity may also have recurring negative thoughts (Good Therapy, 2017).
- Your mind. The unconsciously conditioned believe that whatever can go wrong, will go wrong or that whatever can go right, will probably also go wrong.
How can one learn to be more positive?
- Recognize that things happen as a result of the choices and decisions you make. Own it. Do not blame others. Learn from your mistakes instead of being negative and placing the blame on someone else.
- This takes practice but you will get it. Anytime you find yourself thinking or speaking negative, stop yourself, cancel that thought and replace it with something positive.
- Understand that your future is still being designed; your future outcome does not have to be doom and gloom. Choose optimistic energy and thoughts – a positive change comes from within. As you think it, so shall it be. See a positive outcome/future for yourself and began consciously reshaping your future.
- If you are a positive person and have been the lucky candidate to be blessed with the presence of a constantly negative person, don’t be afraid to say, “Bye Felicia” (to whomever, or whatever the negative Felecia is in your life), that is pulling you down and wreaking havoc on your health and success.
- Surrounding yourself with good people who inspire, encourage, and motivate you to be the best YOU that you can be and pour positive energy into your life. This will help you grow as a person and will enhance your mental state of mind. If your friends are not adding value or harm you mentally, it’s time to walk away (the “Bye Felicia” mentality).
- Meditation, journaling, or blogging may be beneficial in understanding what lies beneath those negative emotions.
- Talking to a therapist.
- Lashing out negatively may be a result of one’s mental health condition, so “…treating the underlying issue first may prove to be an effective method to resolve an individual’s negativity” (Good Therapy, 2017).
If you find yourself being that person giving off negative energy, it may be time to look at making some positive changes to help you have better interactions with people and attract more positivity your way. Improving your energy may take time and a lot of work, but it is worth it.
If someone around you is constantly being negative and refuses to make a change or seek help, as hard as it may be, it may be time to say, “Bye, Felicia!”
Before you work on your outward fashion, work on your inner fashion. – VZÁCNÝ
Bradberry, Ph.D., T. (2012, September). How negativity and complaining rot your brain. TalentSmart. Retrieved December 22, 2019, http://www.talentsmart.com/media/uploads/articles/pdfs/How%20Negativity%20and%20Complaining%20Literally%20Rot%20Your%20Brain.pdf
Good Therapy. (2017). Negativity. Retrieved December 22, 2019, https://www.goodtherapy.org/blog/psychpedia/negativity
Locke, R. (2018). Fifteen signs of negative people. Lifehack. Retrieved December 22, 2019, https://www.lifehack.org/293018/15-signs-negative-people
Mayo Clinic. (2017, February 18). Positive thinking: Stop negative self-talk to reduce stress. Mayo Clinic. Retrieved December 22, 2019, from https://www.mayoclinic.org/healthy-lifestyle/stress-management/in-depth/positive-thinking/art-20043950
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